They May... Just... Go.. All The Way! Western Conference

There are three real contenders playing out West. The San Antonio Spurs, coached by an evil genius, the Los Angeles Lakers, coached by an evil genius, and the Dallas Mavericks, owned by an evil genius. Oklahoma City has created some distance between them and the lower seeded teams, sitting comfortably in 4^th place, and the Thunder have a much more talented roster than those below them, so they’re worth a mention in this category. Certainly the Thunder will feel good going into the first round, and they should take care of business against Portland (who currently own 5^th place and are likely to stay there for the remainder of the regular season) giving the city of Oklahoma City and its top notch fans their first ever playoff series victory and a trip to San Antonio. There, however,the party will end, for if there’s ever a team that the Thunder can’t figure out, it’s the crafty veterans of the San Antonio Spurs.

The Spurs are healthy and playing within a deep dream system that fits together perfectly. The big shot veteran trio of Manu Ginobili, Tony Parker, and Tim "Snake Bite" Duncan is held to around 30 minutes each per night by Coach Greg, the craziest old coot to ever master the brain game of hoops. The young fellas are all starting to find their roles, and bad attitudes are nowhere to be found, and winning 46 games going into the break is definitely a great indication of a confident and satisfied team. Moving the ball is the most important aspect of Spurs basketball. They don’t have any ball-hogs in the half-court offense, such as an Anthony Randolph, Nick Young, or Kobe Bryant. Nobody ever feels the need to take over a game (although Ginobili or Parker are both very capable), which is often what hurts the Lakers with Kobe’s stubbornness. Bryant is a great player capable of great things, but when he’s having a bad night, the Lakers tend to have bad nights as well. On the Spurs, nobody is trying to prove anything to their teammates or coaches, except that everyone has the ability to make the right decisions. Coach Greg knows who he has on his team, and he knows what to expect from each player.He knows how to put his players in the right situation to succeed within a very specific role. He doesn’t care if Matt Bonner misses six straight three point attempts. Bonner's out there to shoot the three, and that's what Popovic expects him to keep doing. Oklahoma City won’t stand a chance in a second round series against San Antonio. This season they lost the first two meetings with San Antonio by an average of 20 points, and tonight the Spurs got the best of OKC once again, winning 106-103 in Texas. With the Thunder losing tonight, very few players on their roster will feel any level of confidence about a playoff match-up with dusty ol’ San Anton.

Mavericks and Lakers in the second round would be about as good as it gets. For one reason, the two somehow haven’t met in the playoffs since the 1988 Conference Finals. It’s incredible to think that with all of the playoff appearances by both teams since 2000, when Dallas upset Utah with three straight wins and put themselves back on the NBA map, that LA and Dallas have managed to avoid each other in the tournament. Both teams have represented winning consistency for the most part of a decade, but with the Lakers doing so in June. Coming into the break, the teams couldn’t be in more different situations considering they sit next to each other in the standings. Dallas has won 13 out of 14 and has a small cushion of 2 and a half games over LA, who has lost 3 in a row, including an embarrassing road loss to lowly Cleveland. The Lakers’ big three are all playing up to par, with Lamar Odom leading the way in the sixth man race, and Kobe and Pau representing the West in the All Star game. The injury to Matt Barnes really hurt LA, and Ron Artest is constantly causing minor internal problems. His production is invisible on the court, and his antics are completely strange. It’s possible that Artest has been in the midst of a season-long joke, and he’s just the kind of player to hit seven threes in the second half of a conference finals game, but at the moment many Lakers fans wish he were somebody else’s headache. Thankfully for the Lakers, Barnes is close to returning from injury. He is the heart of the Lakers bench. Obviously Odom’s their star sixth man, but Barnes completes the guard rotation and his ability to play small forward gives Phil Jackson a quality player to take away as many minutes as Ron Artest can flub away. If they’re healthy in the playoffs, they’ll be just about as good as their probable second round opponent, the Dallas Mavericks.

Dallas has had a classic Hollywood season heading into the All Star break. They started off strong, racking up wins just a notch below the Spurs. As the season continued the Mavericks kept winning, and Dirk Nowitzki suddenly resembled the MVP version that lead Dallas to 2007’s best record. December arrived and Caron Butler started playing better, his field goal percentage shooting skyward through the month. The Mavericks were beating everyone, from Boston to San Antonio to Miami. They were part of the equation again, but the New Year brought injuries to Dallas in one giant knock. Dirk and Butler were lost for extended periods. Butler is perhaps lost for the remainder of the year. Suddenly Dallas was left without their two best scorers and a serious gaping hole at small forward. A six game losing streak followed, and panic in the stands and on the sports page came with it. Fans, who have become accustomed to Mark Cuban’s wheeling and dealing around the deadline, were screaming for a replacement for Caron Butler. Dallas answered by signing Toronto buy-out Peja Stojakovic. Fans didn’t think it was enough, and as Peja racked up DNPs in his first few weeks as a Mav, Dallas continued to struggle as Dirk returned. Stephen Jackson, Tayshaun Prince, Carmelo Anthony, or even Shane Battier. Maverick fans wanted a household name to start at small forward, and many considered a trade to be the only way Dallas would be able to right the ship. The only ones who weren’t in panic mode were the Dallas brass and players, who knew that getting Dirk back on track, getting Rodrigue Beaubois back into the lineup, and by having a deep roster filled with unselfish role players, would be all the wheeling and dealing they would need to be back in the Finals equation. Nowitzki recently reminded everyone that the Mavericks are 36-7 when both he and Tyson Chandler, who has arguably been Dallas’s second best player so far, are in the starting five. Cuban’s always ready to improve his roster if the opportunity shows itself, but this season, looking to shake things up is the furthest thought in his billionaire brain. Dirk agrees, the Mavericks are ready. There’s no need to bring in any help, and winning 13 of 14 games going into the break is proof. If Dallas can stay healthy, they have the roster to win in May.

The Mavericks play a similar style to the Spurs, which is why both teams have enjoyed the two best records in the West. Neither team has a black hole on offense, a guy who demands touches and gets frustrated when others miscue. A sense of family exists in both Texas locker rooms. Roles are understood, and lineups are designed to give the players enough time on the pine to keep them healthy and fresh. Everyone will agree that team depth is a huge benefit during an 82 game season, but perhaps Dallas and San Antonio are proving that it’s essential. The family atmosphere creates confidence, even for bottom of the bench players like Dallas’s Ian Mahimi, who plays without the fear of making mistakes or needing to prove something, and thus creates productive minutes in his short time on the court. Everyone on Dallas’s roster buys into it, as does Cuban, the Maverick Godfather. He may have finally found the right coach for the long-term, with Rick Carlisle making all the right moves with his roster to utilize an ideal rotation. It’s this that separates Dallas from their probable second round opponent, the Los Angeles Lakers. LA has the talent, but the depth isn’t as prominent. If Dallas can hold onto the home court advantage over LA for the second round, old-timer Mav fans will finally have their revenge for the 1988 Conference Final loss to LA, and they will have it in the two teams’ first playoff meeting since.

NBA fans deserve to watch the Lakers lose to Dallas in the second round. Although many fans might prefer to watch Kobe and LeBron in an NBA Finals free throw shooting contest, many diehards want to see the NBA’s best rivalry of the last decade in the Conference Finals, the San Antonio Spurs against the Dallas Mavericks. The Spurs will have the home court advantage (unless...), but Dallas has already beaten San Antonio in their building once this year (the other game in SA came without Dirk or Beaubois, and should be thrown out the window). The teams know each other about as well as anyone, and the two teams playing for a Finals berth would be an absolute treat for basketball lovers everywhere. The Spurs have been the team that figures out a way to win, but this season, the Mavericks are the hungrier team. "This is your big brother, little brother," Jason Terry says of the Mavs Spurs rivalry. "They're big brother because they have all the titles ... You never want to sleep on little brother, though. You know the saying, 'Little brother, in the end always wins.’” This is the year when Terry’s weird predictions might finally come true. Dallas did it in 2006, and they’ll win a game 7 in San Antonio again to find themselves in the NBA Finals for a chance at redemption, just as long as Dirk and Tyson Chandler stay healthy. The Spurs visit Dallas on March 18th, and that game should be watched and enjoyed very closely. If both squads come into it healthy, it could should be one heck of a match, and perhaps, a gauge for the upper hand.

Rocky Mountain Farewell: Carmelo Anthony Trade Saga Ends

Monday’s blockbuster trade didn’t catch anyone off guard. If you’ve been following the NBA for the last nine months you’ve most likely heard a thing or two (or seventy-five-thousand) about Anthony’s desire to be traded to the New York Knicks. Denver tried to bait NY into adding every asset they could bear to offer for the larger-than-life Melo. To be fair to the man, Melo never demanded anything. He planned his future accordingly to what he believed would be best for him, and there’s absolutely nothing wrong with that. He kept quiet when asked about possible trade destinations (like the incredibly bad New Jersey Nets, where the future looks to remain in the realms of the horrible). He refused to answer questions about his possible contract extension and the millions of dollars that he’d lose through free agency. He told reporters repeatedly that he was going to become an unrestricted free agent, and that was all there was to it. In this day and age, NBA superstars get what they want, and it’s best for them to keep quiet about it until what they want comes true (because it always does). Speculation isn’t credible, yet it’s all we ever read about anymore with the NBA. There’s nothing newsworthy or legitimate about Dwight Howard, Deron Williams, or Chris Paul free agency speculation. They’re going to be free agents in a few years. It happens. Speculating about the outcome of their free agency, however, is totally bogus, because nobody knows for sure what’s going to happen; we’re talking sixteen months from now! I do enjoy reading the rumor mill of certain NBA websites, but it seems that speculation is all we get anymore. Don’t these guys play basketball now? Aren’t all three fighting to make noise in the playoffs? Is there really nothing worth talking about other than eventual superstar relocation? Hey, what’s happening in Toronto? Amir Johnson’s living up to that contract, am I right? Wait, what?! Deron Williams just got traded to the New Jersey Nets!?!?! Okay, okay, I see why we talk about this stuff... Let’s just take a look at the three team trade. More to come on Williams in the near future.

Denver got a bounty of young talent- Wilson Chandler, Raymond Felton, Danilo Gallinari, Tomofey Mozgov, a future 1^st round pick, and a few future 2^nd rounders. They unloaded the face of Denver sports ever since John Elway retired (I’d personally go with Todd Helton, but that’s just me), the Denver lover Chauncey Billups, and a bunch of spares (Renaldo Balkman (big Knick reunion!), Anthony Carter, and rebounding type person Sheldon “Sorry Ladies, He’s Married” Williams. Also in the trade, NY traded Anthony “One of the Worst Team Guys in the League” Randolph and Eddy Curry’s wardrobe to the Minnesota Timberpups for Corey Brewer.

I think Denver got a gigantic bunch of solidness for a guy who was going to lead them to a first round loss in this season’s playoffs and then jump ship. As we all learned with LeBron James’ ship jumping experience from last summer, these guys don’t care about a few extra million at the end of the year. They want to play where they want to play, and Denver knew that the contract extension bargaining chip was meaningless to a player who could make those millions in a heartbeat endorsing hamburgers in the Big Apple. They knew that Ty Lawson was their guy at the point for the future, so losing Chauncey Billups made sense. They waited, they clawed, they bluffed, they smoked near mirrors, and finally, with a little help from the sad Jersey team (who thinks for some reason that they’re a real desirable team to play for, when in fact, they’re the complete opposite. “Come play for me alongside Brick Slowpez! Just don’t ask the Dallas Mavericks for a reference,” I imagine Avery Johnson saying to LeBron James last summer, and to Carmelo Anthony last week. I mean, who are the Nets kidding!? Denver’s not making any noise this season in the playoffs (despite a very solid first post-trade game against Memphis), and in fact, they’ll probably finish in the lottery now, which is probably exactly where they want to finish. They wheeling and dealing might not be finished in Denver either, as management seems to prefer draft picks to some of their Knick imports. It’s pretty clear that Denver doesn’t belong in the top 8 teams in the West. Memphis is coming up fast, and the Western Conference playoff bracket isn’t big enough for everyone (the Hornets and Jazz are also be playing crappy basketball at the moment, and heck, maybe there’s also room for Phoenix and Golden State)! Adios winning era of Nugget of basketball that we’ve all grown accustomed to. The sunset in Denver is beautiful, so let’s all enjoy an eyeful as Nugget title contention (or maybe fake contention) rides off into it.

The Knicks are trade winners. I think more so than most are giving them credit for. Carmelo Anthony is a complete player, and his completeness is that of the superstar variety. Who doesn’t win with that? He and Amare will create an incredible offensive tandem, scoring at will. Both attack the hoop with intense strength and quickness, and both have deadly jumpers. Defenders will have to pick a poison, and poison never tastes good. Trust me. I’ve been poisoned. But that’s a story for a different blog. But the most intriguing part of this blockbuster trade in my eyes, is the man who was always a part of the rumors, but who nobody ever really cared to take a close look at. It’s Chauncey! A lot of people have been calling Billups “Over the hill” and “stupid” and “just plain blind and with bad toe hygiene,” but I’m here to tell you that those judgments of Chauncey Billups are simply not accurate. Sure, 34 isn’t a cute little puppy type age, but Billups is a true warrior. His body is a temple, and he takes that temple to the temple store all the time, and buys his temple all the best temple products to make sure his temple is up to his own personal temple requirements, metaphorically. Billups is playing much like he always does, and I think he’s the kind of dude who will continue to do so for another two or three good seasons.

Let’s look at the Knicks lineup. Billups and Landry Fields at the guard spots (first thing comes to my mind is toughness), with Carmelo, Amare, and a revolving door of centers on the front line (maybe somebody gets bought out and finds their way to NY’s starting five at the center position, or maybe Isiah Thomas comes back and brings back Eddy Curry in a second blockbuster trade. We all know Isiah loves Curry). Off the bench they have Toney Douglas and Bill Walker who have played significant roles very recently, and as reserves that matter, they’ll be motivated but won’t have any burden of carrying too much pressure. This team suddenly can beat others who they probably couldn’t beat before the trade. They can probably beat the Orlando Magic. They can probably beat the Atlanta Hawks. They might even have the veteran savvy to beat the Chicago Bulls (yes, I’m going to go out on a tree limb, or a person’s arm, and say that the Knicks can go seven against the Bulls, but will come up just short of besting them). Billups is a leader. He’s an NBA Finals MVP. I suddenly like the Knicks’ chances a lot, and it’s because this trade doesn’t just give them the two superstar lineup that everyone’s talking about with Melo and Amare, it’s because the trade gives the Knicks a THREE SUPERSTAR LINEUP. Billups is a game changer. He shoots threes with ice water in his body. He dishes the ball. Coach Mike will be raving about Billups within a week. Watch for it. Knicks noise will be there this post season. Now if only we can get a few superstars on the Indiana Pacers…

And finally, a short thought on the only real loser in this trade, the Minnesota Timberpups. Sure, Corey Brewer was a bust (but who isn’t in Minnesota other than Kevin Love. Good luck with Rubio yall. His 6 points per game with bad shooting in Europe will transfer well to the NBA game). But to trade for Anthony Randolph…. I mean seriously, did the Timberwolves brass not watch any tape of Randolph before making this trade? He’s easily one of the most selfish and stupid offensive players I’ve ever seen. He takes a pass, holds the ball for 4 to 8 seconds, jab-stepping or ball faking in one place, before going to his small arsenal of one-on-one moves. He’s got talent, but far greater than his talent, he’s got a huge amount of stupidity and bad attitude. He’ll most likely disrupt the small amount of team chemistry that Minnesota has (enough to find themselves losing tons of close games). I’m just glad that the Timberpups didn’t give away a draft pick for the terrible Randolph. Now David Kahn will be able to draft somebody else who stinks.

Driveway Courts

As promised I've compiled a comprehensive list of the official O.W.L. driveway court conditions to uphold for the good of the code of decency (when it comes to shooting hoops at your home) and honesty.

- NEW! (this is just now considered okay) Sand filled base is now fine for hoops at home.
- No plants touching driveway area near court.
- Winner of last game gets to pick dinner.
- Never break up a game because of a TV sitcom rerun.
- Driveway lights are encouraged. Playing basketball at night is the best. What I like to do is sneak out and play when every one else is asleep. It's the best.
- Magic Johnson and Michael Jordan shot baskets in the rain. But that is it. Nobody else should try.
Well. Thanks for your patience. Please remember to share the streets, and remember: repetition, repeat, and remember! (the 3 R's of O.W.L. driveway basketball).

The Fish That Saved Basketball

“Sensing that the team really needs a miracle, the team's ball and waterboy decides to turn to his favorite hobby, astrology, as a way to turn around the team's fortunes. He brings his idea to an astrologer , and they come up with the perfect concept: A team composed of players who were born under the astrological sign of Pisces, thus the 'birth' of ‘The Pittsburgh Pisces!’"







Why it is what it is:
Astrology: Moon in Pisces… mutable, water. Basketball: Dr. J, Kareem, Haywood, Meadowlark, Tarkanian, Marv, etc… Fish: Salmon, Snapper. Life: Counting in Two’s, Rhythm, Perseverance, Love. Music: Sylvers, Spinners.

We've been waiting for a long time now for the Minnesota Timberpups to improve to contender status. Finally, I feel like the resigning of Brian Cardinal is just the retooling of the current Minnesota roster that is needed to produce a winner near St. Paul.

Josh Howard hasn't seen his final allstar game...

The Chicago Bulls need Joakim Noah to stop having plantar facitus and for Brad Miller to stop playing center and maybe they can eek into the playoffs.

I'm not sure what would be more fun... The Miami Heat losing enough to drop into 9th place, missing the playoffs like they did a few years ago... Or what is more likely to occur, and watch them fail fast in the first round against superior players... Lets take a vote. The results will be displayed in tomorrow's bulletins.

And I don't mean Josh Howard sees allstar games like on TV or in the movies. I mean as a member of the East team representing Washington. Speaking of Washington, Andray Blatche sure seems to be in a strange situation with head coach Flip Saunders. A classic game of he said she said. Who knows which one is telling the truth. All I know is that Flip Saunders has been fired twice before and Andray Blatche is still with his original team... Hmmm.

Good matchup tonight, Spurs Lakers. The two Western Conference teams we root for to lose the most. The only thing keeping us from traveling to Los Angeles to watch the game in person was the fact that we wouldn't have anyone to cheer for. We will however be traveling to San Antonio this Friday to witness The Cleveland Cavalier team coming into the ATandT Center, lead by freshly signed center Zydrunas Ilgauskas. With Big Z as their leader on and off the court, the Cavs will be fun to see. Go Cavs! I drink your milkshake San Antonio!

Fake Postgame Quotes! Remembering Matt Pinto

"Tonight I left everything on the table. unfortunately, somebody took my things. If you see a discman, not sure the brand, its mine. Let me know." -Doug Christie

"We are in a funk, but we are going to dance our way out of it. Because dancing is just what assistant coach Dwayne Casey demands from us." -Rodrigue Beaubois

"Baron Davis can't out last a young Bucks team like us. I'm proud to live in Wisconsin." -Carlos Delfino

"Did you see Jurassic Park?" -Jake Tsakalidas

Hornets Talk "Because it's great"

With one month remaining on the old NBA calender, we at Tdub'n3Q are required to watch pro basketball from 6:00 PM until 9:45 PM (central standard). Most of us (myself included) tend to go overtime with game watching, sometimes even finding ourselves watching games passed the midnight hour. Lately we've been forced to watch Hornets games, due to a glitch in the interface system where we work and watch basketball. Lately, one of our peers, Doug Mandavale, has been sitting with us during Hornets broadcasts, which has been annoying, because Doug's constantly complaining about how the Hornets are "just another lottery team," and that he "can't (expletive) wait until the corporate fat cats stop getting bail outs and start fixing the glitch in our interface system so we can watch any game we want," and that he wishes he could watch the "Spurs put the smack down on Minnesota instead of another (expletive) Hornets game." Thankfully, Doug isn't sitting with us any longer. Jerry was pretty adamant to him, so Doug is now sitting near the back with the Dagger Boys (gotta admit, Dagger Boys write good stuff about the NBA). Anyway, seen every Hornets game for the last two and a half weeks, including tonight's late show match-up against the Reggie Williams and Chris Hunter Golden State team.

Let's take a quick moment to discuss head coach Jack Bower. This guy has really let himself go physically. He was once a fictional character played by Kiefer Sutherland, and now look at him. Guess what. He's doing it to get an edge on the competition. And it's working! Coach Bower has really tricked his players into giving their all, and the opposition can't figure out where he's preparing for at any given moment. "I just can't read him," said 76er guard Jrue Holiday. "He's a coaching mystery."

As I watch Hornets games unfold, I tend to keep my eyes closed when Mo Peterson has the basketball. Fred usually taps me on the arm after Mo passes/misses, and I resume watching.

When the Hornets back court has the looks of Darren Collison and Marcus Thornton, that is when Doug's annoying shit talk really doesn't make any sense. I've seen plenty of every team play basketball this season (except the Heat, because they are the worst) and I can say with great certainty that the young rookie duo of Collison and Thonton is the most intriguing and potentially epic guard combo in the league. Thornton's a real NBA guard, and as his career continues you'll see his brain start making more and more right decisions that lead to winning ballgames. The real story here though is Darren Collison, whose future shines just as bright as those rookie of the year candidate Blue Chip names you hear about on AM radio such as Tyreke Evens, Brandon Jennings, or Stephen Curry. While his assist totals remind you of a young Mark Jackson, his shooting touch and ball dribbling maneuvers ring just as true. I'm talking about a ROOKIE POINT GUARD that is shooting .498 and .816 during the last month. His numbers have resembled the likes of Chauncey Billups's during the same period, except Collison has almost three times as many assists. Brandon Jennings knows what's what. He recently stated that Collison was his choice for Rookie of the Year. I think I might agree with him. Finding a rookie point guard gem like Collison with the 21st pick in the draft is a wonderful feeling for such a mediocre team like New Orleans. I'm loving today's Hornets. They compete hard, and they follow their veteran all star David West to the final whistle, and even though they will not be competing in the post season, the future looks pretty nice in soggy New Orleans.

Oh that's right... Chris Paul plays in New Orleans. And he's coming back next week to reclaim his starting spot on the Hornet roster. And he justifiably demands as many minutes as he can handle, because he's the best point guard in the NBA, even though his team is so mediocre (I blame Emeka Okafor and the city's shitty fans who don't go to games which leads the team's ownership group to lose lots of money and thus trimming payroll which inevitably creates a pretty consistent state of mediocrity such as this year's edition with and without Chris Paul). So what am I getting at? You guessed it.

There is no excuse to not trade Chris Paul this summer. Throw him in there and let him play 35 minutes a game for the last month of the season. Show the world that he's healthy and incredible and still the best point guard in the NBA, because guess what? He's also the second highest paid point guard in the NBA (behind Sweet Gil Arenas). Trading Chris Paul might not be popular among your shitty fans, but come on Hornet team managment, your fans don't come to your games. You have to do what's right for you. If you insist on cutting payroll and your losses, this is the no brainer of all no brainers. Paul will command the kind of interest of a young Joe Mauer, and trading him to a playoff contender who can part with a sizable package of young talent including household names is almost a sure thing. Would Memphis offer O.J. Mayo, Marc Gasol, Hasheem Thabeet, and a few first round picks for the best point guard in the NBA? Maybe Atlanta could pair him with Joe Johnson and offer up Al Horford, the rights to Josh Childress and draft picks. Then maybe the Hawks go out and sign freshly waived Erick Dampier and Marcus Camby to create a very very cool Eastern Conference basketball team (but that's another story). Maybe Michael Jordan doesn't particularly care for Raymond Felton and decides to make some big changes, trading Gerald Wallace, cash, and draft picks for Chris Paul. Pretty much every team that doesn't have a top three point guard will want him.

This summer, New Orleans will be in the driver's seat with this whole possibility. Hopefully they'll take the car and drive it like a metaphor for pulling the trigger on a Chris Paul trade.